Hi Jules,
I had a dream about my ex-husband before I married him--it was gruesome and I won't bore anyone with the details--but I should have listened to myself and not married him. We would have both been happier. He ultimately cheated on me and filed for divorce.
I'll never tell you what you should do, and I know what it's like when you've already made living arrangements to make changes at that point. But it sounds like a depressing way to live.
Oh, and the shop trips? Ask you about what you need? Yeah, that's because he is trying to fool you, and to a certain extent himself, about the real reason he is popping out all the time.
Please keep posting and reading! Wishing you clarity and peace!