"So yes I need to do some hard looking at myself to see why I kept touching the hot stove."
^^^^^ Good on you for this Maddoc . . . . . yep, it looks like you have some work to do on yourself.
You probably need to circle every wagon you can as you seem to have one hell of an attraction for that hot stove. Post here everyday or find an online alanon meeting. Do whatever it takes to stay away from this guy and figure out what is going on with you that he has such an attraction for you.