Thank you very much kenton! I really appreciate you sharing this with me, I've actually questioned myself like oh it would be easier to just get along what have I done, but no those angry feelings, sad feelings, whatever need to push me to act and to move instead of to drink. The only way I can do that is to be sober. I went to an on-line meeting tonight and it was actually really great, and I am going to make sure that I come here and be totally honest if I'm thinking about drinking BEFORE it happens.