Sorry about your dad but unfortunately while times like these can bring out the best in folks they can also bring out the worst.
I went no contact (or minimal contact occasionally via phone) with my folks for a while.
My folks aren't alcoholics but it was what I needed to do at the time.
I put myself ahead of toxic people.
Now, several years down the track, I'm stronger. my boundaries are good, and the toxicity doesn't seem as much of a problem to me.
My folks are about 10 years older than yours. I'm glad I had that time away but I'm glad I reconnected too.
Not much help I expect G but thats my story
D