Originally Posted by
OliviaLynnMarsh 
Cityboy, used your advice and cut a deal with him, so to speak. I don't demand that he goes to the addictions counsellor right now, I let him spend 3 months just using the Habits Unplugged program. If he can't stay sober for the majority of time within the 3 months, we'll only stay with him if he goes to the addictions counsellor. I don't think it's a good idea to threaten someone if they slip up, we're only human - I slip up and eat sugar sometimes! But i need to have a benchmark in my head of how to handle slip ups, one night is ok (like last night, he wasn't drunk but just had some and went to bed), but how often? These questions must sound crazy, I'm sorry. I feel crazy sometimes. Not the same carefree, confident woman that was 10 years ago.
This honestly scares me for YOU!
1. Comparing sugar to alcohol is not even in the same ball game. Does sugar make you drive wreckless? Put you and others in danger?
2. Every single time you accept him DRINKING, you are accepting all the actions and repercussions that come with it.
This is your life, live it how you want. If you want to ride a rollercoaster forever, that is exactly what you will do every single time he drinks. If he doesn't act a fool today, don't worry he WILL tomorrow.
See,
I was with someone who wanted me to stop drinking.
I did quit for a while.
He missed his drinking buddy, so he would "allow" me to drink sometimes. Only an ALCOHOLIC needs to count how many drinks they have had, only an ALCOHOLIC needs to make rules for themselves such as "I can only drink beer" "No shots" "I can only drink after 5 pm" "No drinking during the week"
Well, my ex (yes we are now EXes) and I would make all these rules for myself that I could not follow 90% of the time.
I could not follow them because I am an alcoholic. Once alcohol touched my lips, there is NO stopping me from drinking more, wanting more, doing whatever I have to in order to get more.
So, when I finally made the decision to get sober, stay sober and live a sober life... I kicked him out. He would drink in front of me every single night for 6 months. I realized he was not for me. He did not support me, he did not really love me.
Once the fog was clear, everything else in life became more clear. People and their intentions, my goals, and general health and well being.
My mom is an alcoholic. I hated seeing her act a fool and I sadly turned out just like her (monkey see, monkey do) HOWEVER I am well enough to change the cycle of bad parenting and my child will NEVER see me drunk. What a shame any child has to see that, be fearful of what could happen, worry if that parent is okay, etc...
I will keep you in my prayers for strength and courage to get through this.
Blessings,
DC