He’s not going to change. Not for some mythical new person, not for you, not for anyone. He’s in a committed relationship with his addiction now.
If anything, he’s being honest with you in breaking it off. Many are not so fortunate and get strung along for a very long time being exploited and manipulated because of the first and only relationship: addiction.
FWIW, I doubt very much that he is not using. But either way, it doesn’t make any difference because he has ended your relationship and continuing to desperately try to find a way to change his mind or unearth logical reason or comb through past history looking for clues is very, very human and understandable...but it won’t get you on the road to your new life or help you heal.
It’s so, so terribly hard, but try to take a step back and see the big picture here? It isn’t you, it isn’t even him, it’s addiction. And at some point in that downward spiral, addiction wins and everything and everyone else gets tossed to the side.
A therapist or a real life support group is really worth finding right now so you can focus on you.
Sending you strength, clarity, and a hug.
