He's making me doubt myself
I'm confused and need advice. I want to trust my gut in this but you know how alcoholics have a way of making you feel crazy.
As you may or may not know. Last year, when my bf was drinking and pretty much homeless, he stole and pawned ring from my sister. It was recovered and he is on probation. He pled guility but said it was only to spare us and that he found it outside the house.
Prior to that, when he was activly drinking, I'd have change missing from my change jar. He always had an excuse, maybe I spent it, maybe one of my guests took it etc.
He got sober, but has relapsed. Last weekend, I noticed $5 dollars missing from my change jar. I did have a bit too much to drink on that occassion so thought maybe I took it out and spent it.
So last night bf was over the house. He knew I had money in my wallet as we went to the bank together. When I was getting ready for bed I put a $5 dollar bill on my nightstand. He was up while I was sleeping on the couch. This morning we argue as I told him I really don't want this relationship to continue anymore. He left. After he was gone I noticed the $5 missing. I called him and went to meet him. He said he "found" a $5 in his wallet. Said he didn't know how it got there gave it to me. I go home, then notice my Christmas money and a $20 is missing from my wallet. Once again, I go find him. I search his pockets and wallet. Didn't find the Xmas money but did see a crumbled $20 in a wallet compartment. He said that $20 was his emergency money. Prior to Friday he said he was broke. His boss gave him $40 on Friday. That money was accounted for in his wallet.
He now says the $5 he took from my dresser was a mistake, he was cleaning out his pockets and must have thought it was his money when he put it back. As for the $20 he insists it was his. That it was his taxi money he hides in his wallet. Yet, up until Friday, he was so broke he was complaining about change he spent on the pay phones and how he only had money to get a cheap slice of pizza. The Xmas money? - who knows if he took it or I lost it running errands yesterday. if he has it, he hid it on him good.
What to think? He wasn't drinking yesterday, but considering his past, that I was ending it with him, we argued all weekend, that he has lied so many times (drinking) and stole before. Could it be legit ( but my instincts tell me no) or is once again, he is making me doubt myself and think I'm nuts.