amy…...My first thought is that your sister and cousins stirred the pot, first, by urging you to look at your daughters post....when you were trying to avoid it....
And, if I may be so bold as to offer another of my impressions/observations.....it looks, to me, from my outside perch (high on the mountain top)….that your extended family may have rigid family boundaries--as opposed to "too loose" family boundaries.....possibly, "hawkeyeing" each other...monitoring the actions of each other....very, very closely---And....as a result....making hard and fast assumptions about each other's motivations. Sooo many judgements and hurt feelings swirling around.....all bouncing off of each other.
It must make it very hard to feel "safe" and not "judged", most all of the time....
My second thought, on the subject of your daughter's post is this----What is your FEELING about it? I imagine that it is the raw hurt of feeling rejected, as a mother...? I am a mother, myself, and I know how sensitive the "mother buttons" can be...lol...
And, kids can be insensitive to this as they are much more involved in their own world at their own feet. Many a careless word can be spoken, by them.
Gosh...I often pray for forgiveness for my own carelessness to my caretakers, over the years! I wish I could have do-overs.
Amy....you know that your daughter has lots of her own issues, anger, etc....and, yet, not being an actual mind reader...you can never know whatever her true motivations were, at the moment that she was posted. It may, really, have nothing to do about you....
All you can be really sure of , is your own feelings and your own true motivations....
Amy....I think that your post and your deleting the post are both o.k., in the big picture....I don't think either action is going to shake the Universe....
Please don't let it eat at you...don't let this disrupt your inner peace....it is not worth it, in the overall....I know that when we have been emotionally "burned" by others, in the past, it becomes so easy for us to be nicked and cut by the millions of (potential) hurts from the world around us....
I think that the reality is that we all have to let a lot of *hit, in the course of living, just slide....in the interest of our own mental health and serenity.....
Lord knows---I have had to learn to do this in spades....otherwise, my extended family could have ground me down to a fine powder...lol...
Amy...these are just some of my thoughts...if I am off base...please just charge it all up to the prattle of an old woman....and, just let it slide....