Hi Trailmix. I was hoping to hear from you. I think maybe you mean, messed up!? Lol, I can take it. I know you post a lot and help support newcomers and come and goers alike so for you to say that, I guess I need to really come to terms with the reality of my mixed/messed up situation with my STBXAH. I do feel like a fool. And I feel angry. But I really don’t want to hold on to the anger any more.

I am the “long suffering wife” type I guess. Even my mom tells me that I have given myself up for this man. Like, you totally gave up everything...And she’s totally self-sacrificing so I guess a lot of it is learned behavior too. I have been reflecting a lot on what has led me to this and hope to really work on myself. If I ever do meet anyone, I will put myself first. When you love and prioritize yourself (not in a negative narcissistic way of course), the less chance of being taken for granted; taken advantage of.

I am out all day as he gets his stuff packed up today. Sipping an adult beverage while I type this. But thankfully, I can stop at one or half...