I was out last night driving all over town. I saw some folks here and there drinking. They looked tired.
I saw one guy that got so drunk he could not even stand up.
He was just trying to stay awake as people had to step around him.
At least he wasn't asleep.
My physical addiction is gone, but my brain still yearns for the euphoria of being high on booze.
So many folks are doing cbd as well these days. It is a mess.
When I crave I suffer. It used to hurt more, now it hardly hurts. I got here slowly.
I didn't heal or get well as much as I got used to feeling anguish and obsessions. Then things got better.
The brain damage is permanent. The brain has to rewire.
Each relapse make the hell on Earth deeper.
Nobody would really care if I relapsed except my family. The main person I don't want to let down is myself.
I think that is the only way. Dealing w the forever crave is too hard to manage unless it's for me.
Nobody knows except other addicts in recovery.
Getting ready to hit the gym and get me some natural endorphins. The gym can be addiction, but in moderation, it is a key for my continued sobriety.
Thanks.