Originally Posted by
SparkleKitty 
Oh, Nara, I get it. This is an extremely emotional topic.
When I was dating my XABF we had a mutual friend who was a bartender. It made me crazy that this friend allowed XABF to get so blind drunk every time he came into the bar. I said everything I could think of to convince him that he could help with XABF's problem just by saying no when XABF ordered the next drink. Never mind that to do so would actually put our friend's job in jeopardy.
I had to learn (the hard way) that no person or circumstance could MAKE my ex-boyfriend drink. If an alcoholic is determined to drink, it doesn't matter where it comes from--a shop or a flight attendant or a bartender--they're going to do it. On the other hand, if an alcoholic is truly determined NOT to drink, no freebies can make them change their mind, either.
Personally, I am no longer able to enjoy other people's company once they've crossed the line between buzzed and drunk. I very rarely drink myself, and when I do I usually end up regretting it because even a small amount makes me feel irritable and headachey.
That is so very true. I’m just now realize the point I got to while trying to save someone. I knew he would drink regardless, but to some extent i would blame others too.
Now that I’m learning my behaviors and reactions I feel embarrassed. For the longest time I was calm, I would fill up my mouth with water and keep it there until I didn’t feel the need of saying things I’d regret later. But eventually I couldn’t take it anymore and I went full crazy.
I tried that too. I suggested that we tell some of our friends about the problem and maybe they could support us by not ordering alcohol when we went out together, or not being alcohol when we invited them over etc. well he talked me into “my friends are not good for me anymore, so u don’t wanna hang out with them”. True is that he was avoiding letting other people know that he was an alcoholic. I never told anybody besides my sister. And now guess who are the friends he is back hanging out with? Yep... the friends who no longer was good for him. I can’t believe I felt for that ...