I know it’s complicated for you, O. But I understood you are both her mom and the trust fund trustee? In which case, technically, you should be acting (making decisions regarding the use of the funds) as an independent trustee, and not her mom. That is, discarding entirely the mom hat, and allowing the trustee to make the decision, perhaps?
That’s all I meant, because your original post mentioned your stance as a mom, which shouldn’t enter the decision making process, because ordinarily, a mom could possibly be viewed as attempting to over-step and influence a trustee.
Therefore I believe you should act as though you are an independent trustee. Maybe it’s just me and my legal background in the U.K.