Erza…...I agree with ariesagain….cut him off as much as possible while have a child together. Even though you know that those cruel comments are coming from a distorted mind.....it still hurts to actually listen to them. There is no way that it wouldn't hurt! Remove his audience.
give him all the "rope" that he is asking for.....as he will tangle himself in his own rope, eventually.
focus on making yourself strong...developing your own strong boundaries....because, sometimes, they come crawling back, brimming with apology and undying love.....So--you must be strong enough to resist being sucked back into the belly of the beast (the alcoholism)…...