Aw, thanks Briansy. I'm lucky, for sure. I don't know what allowed me to come to my senses so early, but whatever it was saved my life before things got too bad.
Yesterday was a good day. I went to lunch with that guy I'm seeing casually and it was really nice. I am keeping things so so casual for the foreseeable future because the last thing I need is to rush into anything I'm not prepared for. As with sobriety, one day at a time and plenty of time to allow myself to adjust as things progress (or don't, who knows). But it feels nice to be able to connect with someone. If things do get a little more serious, I'm gonna have to tell him why I'm always busy on Wednesdays. For now, he just knows I don't drink.
Other than that, I went to therapy and had a great session. Then it was AA, where the topic was the third step prayer. I did not share. I'm starting to feel a little more awkward that I'm not doing the steps or have a sponsor, but I think it would be worse to do it and sorta fake it if I don't really want to. Idk. It was very god heavy last night, and that's fine, but but it just seemed weird to have that be the topic at a beginner's meeting. Since I wasn't there last week, the guy I make coffee with was happy to see me and told me that he was glad I wasn't dead or drunk. Which he said as a joke, but meant it. Because honestly? Those really are the two other options if I try to drink again. I needed that reminder.
Afterwards I went home and watched Smackdown while kinda dozing off. I've been going to bed way too late because I've been so busy, but I have an evening off today so I'm gonna try to sleep around 9pm.
All in all, good day yesterday. A good reminder that if I keep my head down, keep pushing forward, and doing the next right thing, things fall into place for me. Sobriety is the thread that holds all of this together. If I drink, it falls apart and I'm back at square one. I cannot let that happen.
I feel ready for Thursday today.