<div style="text-align:left;">Hi everyone,<br />this is my second time. I will be one year in less than two weeks. I hate being sober, at least right now and this afternoon. I’m scared.... I feel alone and anxious all the time. I literally have lost the ability to sleep. My mind is racing at night, yet it’s the only time I feel at peace. I have no desire to walk that path again, but I miss it. ‘It’ helped me sleep... “It” helped me feel normal..... “It” kept me thin..... “It” was my medication for everything and now it’s gone. My husband doesn’t understand. I don’t think he gets it. I think he thinks I was just a binge drinker. In reality I was downing up to eight pints a night... or two bottles of wine... or the equivalent thereof. I was getting sick. I would throw up and gag on my first drink of the day. My kids were scared and felt neglected. That was ‘it.” One night, I scared them so much.... it was my rock bottom. No prison, no divorce, no police knocking on the window of my car. Just the innocent faces of my victims (my children.” If any of you have felt this, please share. Maybe I just need to talk to someone who understands. I had this novel thought that the one year mark would be glorious. I was deeply mistaken. </div>