Quote: "Compassion/kindness (I prefer the word kindness) can be walking away. "
Yes, I truly thought my leaving would be his "rock bottom." I knew it would devastate him (it has), and I pondered the ethics of that decision for years before I finally did it. I often told others: "Yes, it is not a good life. Yes, I am unhappy. But it would be unethical for me to leave him."
When I could see that he was killing himself, and destroying me at the same time, I knew I had to get out. I finally realized that nothing, absolutely nothing I did made him stop drinking. I thought....maybe...that finally having to fend for himself would lift him out of the abyss, but it has not.
The anger comes when my sons have to endure the heartache and chaos that was part of my life for so long.
And yes, I do continue to feel compassion for him. I do continue to worry about him. I do continue to be plagued by guilt and grief. However, the compassion turns to anger when he hurts my sons, when he drinks and drives drunk and risks others' lives, and when he leaves death threats on my phone.
He is a human being, yes. But so are his sons and the innocent families driving down the road. And so am I.