It’s a chicken or egg thing... some alcoholics are lovely people who’s addiction turns into jerks.
Some alcoholics are assholes who happen to drink.
You don’t find out until the alcohol is removed, and the person recovers over time.
Neither of those are really your concern,, as you have no control in her drinking or not.
You have control over you, and you have control in what your kids are around.
It sucks that the responsibility of keeping your kids safe falls on you right now. It sucks that the person you live with treats you terribly.
No signs are pointing at the moment to her being better to you, or better for your kids. I’m sorry for that.
Please take care of you.