Stay with us Strugglingto. You can do it again. You MUST do it again right? The only other alternative is grim. Don't define yourself as being "alone" either, as if that is some unique burden you must bear. Even if you were surrounded by people, you are still alone in your own head no matter what and you have to solve this by yourself, on your own, in your own head. Getting comfortable with it just being me inside my noggin was a huge part of my recovery. Once I became calm again and could think, all on my own, the friends came back around and so will yours. One positive is that you will only be left with friends who truly love you and who you love. Aim for quality not quantity. Come back and post because we are worried about you.