Bekindalways, wise soul that she is, posted this in another thread:
Originally Posted by
Bekindalways 
He also said something that revealed that his idea of his role in the relationship was pretty much as a passive recipient of my ongoing attention
I think that's pretty profound and it also seems to apply in many cases where there is an addict in a relationship.
It seems hard to fathom that being a passive partner in a relationship would ever be ok with anyone but in fact it seems to apply in many cases here (for the alcoholic). Just an interesting way to look at it.
I will be the recipient of your attention and I basically don't have to do much of anything at all.