fwn......Oops! I did not know the extent of your desire to maintain social secrecy about your husband. If I had, I would not have written a "book" suggesting that you see an alcoholism counselor who has many years of recovery under his belt......so that you can learn the realities of what true recovery looks like and how long it takes. I am, now, guessing that you will be reluctant to talk to anyone in your town (including counselor) about this....
I am thinking that you (and he) will be relunctant to talk to anybody in your small town. Is this, perhaps, why he only went to one AA meeting....to try to maintain secrecy?
I see another quandry here---Given that genuine recovery will require lots and lots of AA meetings, and a sponsor, and outreach work....And, early recovery takes 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 yrs....depending on who you talk to...How in the world do you plan to stay in the same house and maintain secrecy for years to come?
If you knew what was behind closed doors in your town, you would be shocked at how many other's lives are affected by alcoholism. And, you might be surprised at how many people already knows that your husband has a "problem".
Now, I am not saying to spread your personal lives up and down the streets...because, I do think that only those who have a "need to know" should be privy to your business....But, it is awfully hard to live in a vacume in a small town, as you describe.....
Concerning the house and the kids schooling....I suggest that you go back to your other thread and read the post that I made to you on 6/20/2019 at 5:PM.....
I have been through the single parent thing with 3 small kids...and, I believe, that as young as your kids are...what happens inside their home and the mental state of their mother is more influential than their school life....al things considered.
You did say that you didn't want to be going through this a few months from now....but, I get the feeling that you have some unrealistic expectations of your husband's ability to "nail this down" in a few month's time.....
That is why I have harped on seeing an alcoholism counselor with years of recovery to inform you about it.....informed decision making....