5 Days Sober and feeling a little better
I haven't been really active on this forum must at all. I had about 10 months of not going on a binge. Been focusing on working and working. Which was not the best thing to do because I didn't really put any effect in my sobriety. The only thing I really care about from those 10 months was making money. I would work wake up get ready for work and when I get off of work, I would do deliver food like UberEats and Grubhub. I would put in a little time at the gym and go home and sleep for 4 to 6 hours a night. I use to listen to those Talk Sober video once a week for a month or so then I stop with that and just went back to my normal political and money talk videos when at work and delivering food. I hardly talk at all and never confront my problems in life. I just push it back in my money and focus on money. I hated most people because I felt that they had their life in check and I was standing still.
Been going through this for the last 10 years, weird how time really fly by. I have 5 days of sobriety now. I'm feeling a little bit better today. What really hurts the most is my bloated from the crappy food I eat. I'm taking some meds that I got from the hospital to help me with my anxiety. The last few days which I don't have a job now is listening to some sober talk video, trying to rest which I can't getting any sleep and drive and deliver some food so I can get some income before I find a new job. Reflecting my life choose with alcohol is something I will need to deal with the rest of my life and I don't need alcohol or be around alcohol to have fun, or to avoid my problems. Need to learn how to deal with my anxiety, self angry and be happy for once. 3 months I will be 37 years old and I'm still stuck at a mindset of a 16 years old. This has to change because this will kill me if I don't.
Anyway, 5 days sober and thanks for reading my post. Will post in the next day or two.