Finally admitting I have a problem.
I told myself on Tuesday I would cut back and not drink during the week. Well here comes Thursday night and I’m drunk again on the couch. Next thing I remember I wake up from being blacked out, I’m sleeping on the coach, my kids made it to bed and are in their jammies, dinner I made is still all out from night before. I’m ashamed of myself, did I get my kids to bed or did my husband do it while “mommy’s passed out” again!
But I get up, get ready and go to work.. feeling hung over and tired. On the outside I look like I have it all and put on a smile, show all the cool trips we do on Facebook, have the nice house, cars, atv’s, boats and camp trailers.... but I’m a mess!
I have used alcohol to get that buzzed feeling, to not be so scared to talk to others since I have major social anxiety, used it to relax, to feel better to cope with life’s problems, but I’m now at that point I can’t quit drinking and crave it. Even if it means I’ve let my family down, caused scenes at get togethers, gained weight for my poor diet and lifestyle. I can’t just have one drink... I need to quit!