Well, he recently broke up with me. I asked hi if he had been contemplating a break up and he said yes for the sake of his sobriety. He says he couldn't do this relationship with me and still stay sober. He thought I didn't care about his sobriety and the face he had to focus on himself, which I thought was selfish thing to say after I gave him a card and gifts yesterday and made it all about his sobriety.
He thinks given everything on my end, I'm going to cause him to relapse.
He claims he couldn't take much more of me leaving him notes in his car and stopping by the house and dealership to see him like I did. (Says he felt threatened, overwhelmed. Claims it amounts to stalking and it's not normal. Told me to get some help.) But I only resorted to doing what I did because he kept saying he'd call me and never did. I got tired of it. If he had only made more of an effort and followed through on his promises, I never would've had to do what I did. I thought we were clear from the start of the relationship to always be open, honest and communicative in terms of needs and wants. I'm not quite sure what happened here. He was the one that really wanted the relationship and pushed for it. Not me. I was the hesitant one.
I don't know why he wanted this relationship to begin with if he knew he was going into recovery and needed to be focusing on himself. He asked a lot of me. I also gave a lot and got nothing in return. I went from being happy to being treated rudely and disrespectfully here.
It was obvious in the beginning the relationship helped him see he needed to get sober. It seemed good for him. I guess he just couldn't handle it.
He told me prior to the break up he's not the kind of guy to use a woman, but looking back all signs point to that and so many others even see it as such.
He wanted to drop money off at the realty office I work at. I told him no. I don't want a penny from him. I did tell him though if he wants t return my gifts I'll take them so I can eventually give them to another man that deserves them. If he drops them off, great and if he leaves me money in the process I'll take it.
Jennifer and I have been talking. She thinks being intimate like that and giving him a ******* was way too soon. She also thinks that because I look a lot like his wife, he's probably trying to substitute me for her especially because he posted on FB the day after I gave him that ******* that he missed his wife.
Anyhow, it's probably for the best. My friends are telling me I deserve better and that I had been contemplating breaking it off myself in the days if not week leading up to this.