It’s great that you want to help, SuburbanGal.
It speaks to your generosity of spirit.
But...recovery is an inside job, and it’s hard.
I will say it again.
He is asking for space, though, to be fair, I think he is also throwing some mixed messages at you, just to keep things confusing.
I would give him the room he asks for.
I’m sure he knows that you care.
Do you have a lot of experience with addiction and recovery? I know you mentioned a friend who is in recovery.
If not, there are tons of good articles on this site.
They are called stickies and are at the beginning of each forum.
There are also many wise people here who have experienced the same things you are going through now.
They should be coming along to post soon.
Peace.