The boyfriend and I had a falling out Monday night.
Ever since he left the one place for where he is now, he stopped calling to check in, see how I was holding up and talk to me. He then kept telling me he'd call me after a meeting or whatever and the call would never come.
I finally got to a breaking point. I was down at the docks Monday night, saw a couple kissing and just kind of lost it. I texted him telling him where I was and that I had been crying for awhile. His response was, "WOW! We talked about this (having to go slow)." I then said a few things I probably shouldn't have and he ended up blocking me, not only on the phone but FB as well. (Apparently, he was nervous about a job interview the next day and in a meeting (like I was supposed to know that!))
Tuesday evening I went over to the recovery house. We talked a bit and he let me kiss him. Told me he was going to unblock me as far as the phone went. However, after a few texts since then to wish him luck on today's interview and whatnot, nothing from him. I talked to him at the dealership briefly this morning and kissed him. He said he'd unblock me from FB but I'm still blocked. One of my friends on FB checked his page not long after and said he posted the following message:
She'll know what I mean!!! Slow and low!!!!
I know that was in reference to me because he posted it minutes after I left the dealership and when I asked him not long ago on a scale of 1-10 with 1 being not serious, 5 being somewhat serious ad 10 being serious where our relationship fell on that scale, he said 10. (I was more or less expecting an 8, maybe 8.5.)
My friend Jennifer, who's used to be an alcoholic addict, understands where he's coming from and the need for going slow and for me having patience.
As for not calling me, she's as stumped with it as I am. We think he may be afraid and doesn't want to say something that would hurt me. We're really not sure what's behind it. He could also just feel really overwhelmed too (in terms of finding the time and privacy, as he does have a roommate). It could even be a little bit of both.
He texted me late last night last Thursday and told me he wasn't quite ready for all out sex but wanted a bj so I went and picked him up so I could take care of his need. He then told me we'd hook up Sunday night and he'd take care of my need. He even told me if I had a need to start telling him because he didn't want to deprive me of a sex life yet Sunday came and went and we didn't meet. He says he doesn't use women in that way, as that's not who he is. But I do wonder at times it we jumped into intimacy a little too quickly.
This is all so new to me. I just thought I was getting a married but separated man when I agreed to get involved in this relationship. The fact he's in sober recovery is something I just wasn't expecting. By far, this is one of the hardest and most challenging relationships I've ever been in,
If anyone has insight or advice they'd like to share, please do.