I was like that because the idea that I could be happy was a completely foreign concept to me.
When I started my sobriety after two failed attempts my goal was simply to live a "normal" life without having to white knuckle my way through it. If I could eliminate or control my cravings and remain abstinent I would have been fine going through life on cruise control. Happy? Pssh that was for other people, not for me.
Instead I was pleasantly surprised to find out that by working on myself and making peace with my past I found the happiness that had eluded me my entire life.
I feel compassion when I read the negative posts because the people starting their journeys probably aren't aware happiness can be theirs as well. So I share my experiences, as do others, to show that there is a better way to live.