I think most of used told ourselves we were used to chaos, or that we were conditioned to drink on Fridays or that sober anxiety was just too much to handle.
I said all those things myself.
But when push came to shove - die or stop drinking - I stopped drinking.
Fridays got better the more sober fridays I had...my anxirty got better the longer I stayed sober and the more I delt with my problem rather than running away from them by drinking.
I discovered the person I was becoming liked order and peace a hole lot more than chaos (If I'm honest I never liked chaos but it was familiar to me - you can make a new default
)
It took time tho- more than a few weeks, and it took courage...and a little faith that if I stayed sober, and worked on myself, things would get better.
The early days are hard - but posting here everyday helped me. This is a great community - especially f you use us before you drink rather than after.
If your anxiety is debilitating why not see a Dr?
You can do this Hope - if you're ready to put up with a little short term discomfort, ask for help, make some changes and stick to them
D