Try not to be too hard on yourself.
You're not an alcoholic and I don't know how much you know about it but we don't know what we don't know, but you will. It's not common knowledge.
Alcoholism is not something that someone can just "cut down" from, that's something that probably 99 percent of alcoholics would like to do but find they can't. You will learn more about this as you read around the forum.
Again, actions, not words. Right now she is working on her drinking issues in a bar in Mexico. Sorry if that sounds harsh but it's perhaps best to look at the reality of what is happening rather than hoping it will all magically work out somehow.
Hang in there, you will get this sorted out.
Aside from her issue, what would you like to see for yourself? Perhaps while she is away it's a good time to look at what you want for your life.