Welcome to SR Robert! You will definately find and lot of helpful information and advice from others that have walked a mile in your shoes with no judgement here.
Originally Posted by
Wobert 
I also need to clear out the negative mantras that have a hold of me and replace them with new and positive ones.
Just wanted to pick up on the above, for me this is vital for recovery. I have a little whiteboard by my kitchen door with some positive mantra's on or ones that make me stop and think. One of them is "What story are you telling yourself". I used to tell myself I was stupid, hopeless, a horrible person, not worth loving and that I wasn't good enough. Quite often my reaction to other people was in response to the story I was telling myself not what they were telling me so I got defensive or responded inappropriately.
Time to start telling yourself a better story Rob, glad you found us! xx
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