Hi xNOiSEx
I'm sorry for all you have going on right now. I won't speak to the counselling or the medico thing - sounds like you feel you have that in hand.
Let me share some experience tho. I know in the past I had an idealised idea of recovery - my life would be perfect...and when, of course, it was not - I went back to drinking.
I think I missed the point there for a lot of years - it's not about life getting better (although in the long term it certainly does) it's about me getting better.
By the end I'd be drinking for so many reasons that I lost all confidence in my capacity to deal with hard things.
Staying sober gave me the realisation that I was far more capable and competent than I knew - and I was stronger too.
Over the years I've come to love being responsible, being 'there' for loved ones and dealing with problems sober as much as I used to love numbing out and running away.
The difference is this way nourishes me and helps me grow - running away simply depletes me.
I may indeed die tomorrow - who knows? - but I'd rather have lived a life rather than waiting for the end to come?
Stand your ground - its tough and new and uncomfortable I know...but you're heading in the right direction IMO.
D