I can relate Alex. I have also been struggling to stay sober. If not for my family, I would probably be homeless. Addiction is not choice once you get there unfortunately. I am only 8 days sober myself and just came out of a week of detoxing.
The important thing is that you keep trying. I usually take the opportunity of running out of money to detox. Batten down the hatches, close the curtains and take the weekend to get through the withdrawals.