Originally Posted by
Primativo 
That is all very true. Just a part of me does think, well I could just have a weekend and then back on the wagon again afterwards. As you say though, if I give in for this, then there are always other events on the horizon where I'll be tempted to give in too.
Also, I'm worried that if I drink again, especially after a long weekend of intense drinking, there's a real possibility I could end up on a binge and not be able to stop. I mean, it's happened before. That scares the life out of me. My last binge I ended up in hospital because I literally couldn't stop drinking. I've relapsed since then and there's been no binges, but I don't want to risk it and I genuinely don't want to drink.
I guess there's like 95% of me not interested at all but like 5% is telling me "you should go, you never see your friends etc etc"
I suppose this isn't unusual in early recovery.
My last drink and inevitable binge, was somewhat similarly planned, with a lifelong, friend at a sporting event. It was a planned relapse and ended up being the last time I paid the piper. Really it was a brutal end to a brutal run I put myself through. Nothing about making that decision do I respect or would do again. I only postponed the inevitable and suffered as a result - professionally, personally and spiritually.
All that said to the effect of - you'll do what you decide to do. Not going and not relapsing - if you make that decision, you will never regret it.