I have also experienced anxiety and depression life-long, and they were bad enough. I added alcohol to my life and it seemed to make things better for a while, lifting my anxiety and social problems, and while I was younger and healthier I sustained a period of drinking where it seemed to "work". All the while I was just being an alcoholic, and the problems started to arise to terrible levels.
So, you're not alone in being subject to all of those difficulties, not anywhere, and certainly not here on SR.
I agree with all of the comments made here about approaches toward trying to get a handle on your situation, you need some help. Your anxiety may being working against reaching out, but it's the best, perhaps only, way that things can improve for you. I think that you'll feel relieved if you just get started, though things will not be easy street.
I would begin with seeing your doctor, as has been suggested, be absolutely honest in your medical and mental history. It's hard for somebody to give you the best possible aid if they don't know the whole story about what you are going through.