you're on the right track.
I can relate to pretty much all of what you said.
In my experience, AA 'wasn't for me' - until it was.....
Until I was ready to look beyond the things that scared me or felt weird and just approach it with an open mind.
AA wasn't the only thing that resulted in my nearly 5 years of sobriety.... but without AA it wouldn't have been successful.
You can do it!