At the same time, I think, I'm getting angry over a piece of office equipment?
No - it's not about the equipment. This sounds like "chandeliering" to me - when a minor even triggers an enormous reaction & we "hit the chandelier". This happens to me every time I stumble over a new trigger related to deeper damage.
She wouldn't know a boundary even if it came with a moat, a barbed wire fence, and a ring of fire.
1st - thank you for this imagery.
2nd - I think that people like this make it extremely hard to stay in even Limited Contact over long-term relationships. Detachment has limits, IMO, when you both continue to walk in opposing directions over many years. She's dissolving further & you are (hopefully) getting emotionally healthier. 2 completely different agendas.
3rd - I'm in total agreement with atalose - no way I'd talk to sis about anything. She has no desire or capacity to understand. What can you say differently *this* time? That's not yours to fix in any way & it only intersects with your path if you invite it over.
Can I ask a personal question? Do you feel a lot of guilt over being the "healthier" one? Do your feelings toward your sister possibly get wrapped up in feeling that you had some sort of advantage over her a the favored child? Do you feel like you owe her for that disparity?
Many, many hugs.... this is HARD STUFF!
