I am beyond grateful... I have tried for over and a year half to have some sobriety again, after 6 years of sobriety ended Jan 2017. I thought I could finally drink like a normal person. So so WRONG! I found myself in a place where I could not string together more than 30 days.. and that was rare, most time 3-4 days is all I could go. It wasn't just wine anymore, it was vodka, gin, all of it. Anything that could give me that buzz. Sense of relief I thought.
I am thankful I had the monthly groups, they were so supportive. I started in March, and finally in August it clicked. I drank myself silly in front of dear old high school friends, made a fool of myself in front of my husband and then came home to my kids seeing their mom relapse again. I was done. They were done. And today 84 days later, I am working on staying sober, being grateful and not letting it control me. It is so cunning and baffling, it just grabs a hold of you without remorse. I tried apologizing to my friends and unfriended those who couldn't understand.
I Keep going, I'm 46, happily married, mom of two daughters in college, financially sound, have a good job, beautiful home, have faith in my life, but this disease of alcoholism wants to take all that. I won't let it. I won't. One day at a time.
Feeling blessed in the Midwest!