Tacitus

Hi all from sunnyish France.

I'll introduce myself first.

I'm 55, married with two young children and up to recently a quite heavy drinker. I've been drinking for near forty years on a daily basis. A typical day might involve a half bottle of wine and an Irish coffee at lunch, a large gin and tonic or two on the train. At home, two or three cans of 12% beer and wine. Two to three bottles. You get the picture. (Wine is so cheap here, and a ten litre box costs a pittance).

All the while, I was holding down a responsible job as a architectural consultant in IT.

Now to cut to the chase. This level of drinking inevitably takes its toll, and, over the last year or so, I began to show the signs: shakes, permanent tiredness, weakness, inability to eat, blotchy skin, poor motor skills and more.

So I am tested for a broad range of readings. Results showed deficiency of vitamins B1 & B21, dehydration, some malnutrition and some fat on the liver.

The immediate advice from the consultant was to give up drinking immediately. No taper (and no supervision suggested), two liters of water per day, and vitamin supplements.

It seems to be working in that I have recovered my appetite, my skin is clear, my eyes are clear, I have more energy and am sleeping better.

Here's the kicker: this may antagonize some, but that is not intended:

Thus far, after five weeks, I have had no major issues. At the outset it took me three or four nights to sleep in any way properly. Nor have I had add any cravings to date. A couple of times, after working the formerly neglected garden, I've felt like a beer. That's in the sense that a beer would be nice rather than needed. There is alcohol in the house (I'm seriously into cooking, and some dishes benefit from a glug of rum or whatever). It goes into food and not down my throat.

This is where I must emphasize that I am not being smug. Please please believe this. I am actually very very frightened.

Will I be hit with huge withdrawal at some future stage? Will cravings develop over time? Why have I suffered only very minor physical withdrawal and, to date, no cravings? One physical impact has been soreness in my right calf - I'm not sure whether that is related, though.

Any damage to my liver is a different matter.

My next appointment is in eleven days and I have lots of questions.

I should add that on awaking my first thought would be as to what alcohol was in the house and to arrange my day so that a beer run was included by me or my wife, who has always been teetotal (well, maybe a glass of wine per week). I was hiding beer. I'd always leave a glass full in the box in case she asked for a glass; that concealed the fact that I'd got through ten litre in a few days - the box could be two-thirds full so far as she was concerned.

Soory for the novel-length post. I really am worried and would dearly love to hear whether there are others who went through the same, whether there are deep traps awaiting me out there, and whether it is possible to develop physical addiction without accompanying psychological addiction.

In the meantime, I'm completely avoiding complacency. I feel that I could manage one beer on its own, but I'm aware that many others suffer from that illusion.

Does anyone have any observations/help?