Originally Posted by
Angelachase 
Oh, and I have attended several al anon meetings...but I have to say the mentality I got from it, of either leave or let it be, is not an option for me. I don't believe in it.
Originally Posted by
Angelachase But he says he wants nothing more but to be sober and stay that way. He just says he wants to do it HIS way.
It sounds like you are two very headstrong people who are both refusing to accept help or take on board what people with experience are telling you. I fear you will both just butt heads and nothing is going to change. If you want him to listen to the experts then you should really lead by example otherwise it seems hypocritical. “Do as I say not as I do” is not a tactic that works well with an addict, it just makes them more resolute to use in secret.
Best of luck with whatever you decide to do, like others here I know if my partner did the same to me I would be really angry and it would make me drink more but we are all different and respond differently. x