Thank you so much for your support Andy & August. I really need it. I feel so alone.
I’m in so much pain I can’t move and it’s unbelievable that I still have thoughts about crawling to the shop for more drinks. I’m so sick of it... sick of wanting to numb my feelings, sick of trying to escape myself, sick of my mood swings and sick of feeling like I’m in chains. Sometimes I really think there’s no other way but to kill myself. All this brokenness... nobody needs that. I’m sorry. I’m just really tired. I want to believe that change is possible. I hope I’m gonna feel a tiny bit better tomorrow.