Kathy, those 2 broads sound hopelessly obtuse and disrespectful of you, -- through ignorant carelessness or ego?
When I run into someone's strong expectations about my "right" response , I tend to offer them the opposite. Glad-handers in particular get my back up!
But not as much as 4 a.m. rising! Badger, have you tried putting a pillow over his face and holding down?
FBL, you sound like the kind of guy of a certain age who would, if he wanted, make a perfect mate for a grown woman with good sense.