This is a nice idea for a thread Angel!
I keep thinking of the good times and still try to excuse all his hurtful and bad behaviours.
I don't miss...
- how you gave me the silent treatment every few weeks, not knowing what's going on, whether we're still together, leaving me worry about you while you were having a great time
- how you broke up with me countless times to take it back again
- how you kicked me out every time I had a complaint or grievance, even if that was in the middle of the night, threatening to call the police if I don't leave. What would you have told them anyway? That you're abusive?!
- how you always had to have everything you cared about your way and behaved passive aggressively or like the victim when I wanted something else
- how you were never interested in finding a compromise in situation
- how you never apologised to me for all the horrible things you did to me
- how you instead tried to make me feel sorry for you whenever you hurt or disappointed me by saying you already feel like a failure
- how it was always about your feelings, never about mine
- how you kept telling me that my feelings are unreasonable and I have to learn to control my emotions better when you hurt or scared me
- how you shouted and yelled at me and called me names whenever you were angry
- how easily you lose your temper and overreact to things like having to take the bins out when you're not in the mood for it (who's ever in the mood for that?!) or threw out all our food because something small went wrong with the cooking, you behaved like a toddler
- how moody you are and how you don't make any efforts to get yourself out of a bad mood but put it out on me instead
- how easily offended you felt and how you never took ANY form of criticism, how you turned every complaint back against me
- how you kept telling me I wasn't good enough between the lines while I already was better at everything than you are
- how you hate yourself, your work and your life most of the time, but don't change anything
- how you kept promising to go to therapy but that never happened
- how you twisted everything around and blamed me for all our problems when you are clearly having a ton of own and much worse problems
- how you view relationships, you never wanted one that is built on equality and trust but one that is built on you controlling me
- how you don't have any real friends
- how you never wanted to meet my friends and didn't like it when I socialised much
- how jealous and mistrusting you are
- how bad you are with money
- how you never kept your word
- how controlling and inflexible you are in life
- how you and your needs always come first
- how you care much more about how others see you than how much you care about their feelings
- how you belittled all my problems and my studying while playing up how much you do at work ( I don't think you could be that busy if you had time to play playstation with your colleagues and take a 2h lunch break on top)
- how disgusting your flat is, you never cleaned it, how sticky the kitchen floors were and the mouldy shower, the stinking toilet
- how you pushed me towards driving again when you didn't even want to get a license
- how you still keep hoping for a career as a professional artist but never even learned the technical stuff behind it because you can't be bothered
- how dependent you are on your instagram likes and how it was so much about that all the time
- how dishonest you are
- how you manipulated and controlled me and then accused me of doing those things to you
- how you made yourself look so differently in the beginning, like you were a caring and reliable person
- how you had no interest in my interests so we would never go to the opera or ballet for example
- how you made all the decisions on your own, where and when we'd go on holiday, how much it will cost, when we speak to each other, when we see each other
- all your double standards, for you it's okay to sit and draw or watch the telly all night after work but you expected me to cook
- how you wanted me to report to you any time I am in contact with a male person while you didn't tell me anything
- how you would decide on your own to go on a holiday on your own we had planned on going together and when I said I wished we'd make decisions like that as a couple you have the worst anger outburst, saying the most hurtful things to me and go on a one month no contact
- how you never apologised for those things, feeling justified to do them
- how you kept telling me I was a liar and shouting at me, standing in front of me while I sit on the floor crying but you keep going cause you felt like you had to "break" me so I know I can't mess with you
- how you kept thinking I would run you over if you let me have things my way and tried to keep me down
- how you shout at your mum and insult her, how you view women
- how you lied about your ex, making her look like a mentally ill person who controlled and abused you when in reality it was the other way around
- how negative you are, always criticising everything and every one around you
- how ungrateful you are
- how you were nice and caring and a good listener only when you were in the mood for it but cold and rejecting when you didn't feel like it
- how you never accepted that you are an adult and that it's not just you who has to deal with paper work or household stuff even when they don't fee like it
- how you never took any responsibility for your actions but blamed others for it
- how you kept telling me how much you worry that I will leave you because you have nothing to offer but then you were the one leaving me while I kept believing in you
- how you dumped me while I was in hospital with a broken leg and I was even pregnant with your child!!!! (admittedly we both didn't know about the pregnancy then)
- how you left me to deal with the miscarriage alone and blocked me right after I told you about it! You really have NO manners at all
oops, that was a long list....