I agree. I am not going to get caught up trying to be all joyous and festive when I really don't feel it. That is why I used alcohol during the holidays.
Right now I just had a massive anxiety attack that came "out of the blue". I am laying down in my room and am going to put on some headsets to calm myself.
I have no idea what caused it. It was like something was attacking me. My heart started racing. It is subsiding...