Every day is a struggle. I wake up each day able to function, but lose ground as the day progresses. By the time I get home I need a 45min nap to combat the fatigue before I start drinking. I sleep a minimum of 9 hours a night so I can work the next day. My passion is cooking, and when I do that I'm very happy. Often wish I could trade alcohol for gourmet cooking. I realize I cannot handle the drinking and just wish I could move on like I did when I quit smoking. I am a high achiever at work but totally shut myself down at night, barely able to remember what happened the next day. I feel I am close to making the choice to quit as I did when I quit smoking....Just need a little push to do it