clarity.....in my case, when my alcoholic (adult son) had been drinking....I could tell it...every single time! lol...of course, he denied it every single time.
In fact, I could even tell if he was WANTING to drink....because he would become very irritable and try to pick a fight...so as to have an excuse to go drink....(he was not allowed to drink or be drunk when staying in my house)….
I don't remember how long your husband has been out of rehab...but, he may have gone back to "sipping".....
It is likely, if he is drinking on the side...that his behavior will become more obvious.....and, you probably won't have to wait too much longer.....
You could give him the reality feedback that his particular behavior sucked...and tell him you boundary...that you do not want to be around him if he is behaving like an arse…….You can tell him..."I don't know what got into you, but I sure don't like it".....
If he is drinking...he will dig his own hole...because, that alcoholic voice, in his head, will be screaming at him 24/7. That is the nature of alcoholism.....a constant battle, inside of h is head...even when he looks normal, on th e outside.....
Just out of rehab, he needs tons and tons of support...from his program and h is sponsor and his counselor.....I sure hope that he is working a program.....
Clarity....I totally...totally, get how upset you are.....If the future of your marriage hinges on his sobriety.....a relapse signals that the whole thing is in danger....and, t hat can take a once hopeful heart and slam it to the bottom of the ocean...…
You are naturally, wanting to k now the whole truth this very minute....but, you won't get the truth without, probably, an enormous fight....or resentment toward you...and, more skill in hiding it...if he is truly drinking, again.....
Have you made a plan for how you would deal with a relapse, on his part....? did the two of you ever talk together, about what the plan would be if he should relapse?.....