It sounds to me that you need to do some kind of recovery program. What you describe is not my experience with any part of AA and definitely not what the program is supposed to be. AA is not about religion, and there is a whole lot of advice for living and lots of good people involved in a program that is solely intended to carry its message to the alcoholic who still suffers, which I sure was and you sound like you are too.
Like Scott said, getting help and getting it from people other than what our own brains think will work (like willpower, hope, avoiding alcohol, positive thinking...) is something most of us had to do, or simply found made the process of getting sober and learning to live in recovery possible.
Judging others did not help me, nor did spending time with people who were making bad choices and actions in their own lives.