The biggest delimma I have is that when he's sober as opposed to not he's a completely different person. When he's sober he's amazing, he's absolutely perfect for me but when he drinks he's the exact opposite. I feel like im being used to an extent but also allowing it to happen because of the hope I have that he will change. Before him I had never met anyone with any sort of addiction so most of these feeling are new to me. Like I had stated we've been together for 2 years but the majority of that was just abuse mentally/emotionally. I stayed because I do feel a deep connection with him(when sober) and obviously I love him. I didn't know what I was getting myself into then but now I have a wonderful relationship with his 2 kids and his immediate family. Ive always been the type of person that puts the needs of others before my own and I've gotten burned plenty of time for it(no doubt in this situation as well) but that's just who I am and have always been. Perhaps I need to change as well and develop some boundaries that I hold valuable.