Reason For drinking
Just over 4 weeks sober, had a little get together with some old friends but I didn’t drink and feel so relieved.
The build up to it was bad, I felt like a coiled spring ready to go. This has got me thinking about why I started binging in the first place.
Looking back I have always felt like this even before I started drinking as a teenager. I think I used the alcohol to numb out the almost hyper like states I get in to.
I have never been diagnosed or don’t feel depressed however I do sometimes get a rush where I feel on top of the world and where by I could achieve anything.
I would then drink to calm myself down and for the next few days to a week I would have no motivation, then the cycle would repeat.
I suppose what I’m asking is has anyone else had a similar experience? I’m thinking the best thing to do is use the high to my advantage by exercising or taking up something new and putting all the energy into that rather than suppressing it with alcohol.
It might seem strange me moaning about feeling positive and on top of the world but it was to much and I think this is what got me into this cycle of binge drinking.