Thank you all who have responded. I have read every single post and am taking every suggestion into consideration. No I have not nixed anything....I am just trying to make it through the day....is why im even on here. I feel like I can't even post anything else on here until I go to an AA meeting or ill just get a backlash. I respect everyone's comments and suggestions but I've learned there are other options other than AA no? Again...I havent nixed anything....just keeping options open....except for drinking. And if your way of helping me is tough love because that's what you needed well I respect that too. I do have a desire to stop drinking....or I wouldn't be on here. I get it though...action is louder than words.