I have an weekend away with some friends that I haven’t seen in a while for a bachelorette party. I have to go or it would cause a lot of issues and hurt feelings. I haven’t told my friends that I’m living clean and I’m so scared to for so many reasons. I’m sure you’re familiar if you’ve gone through this. I plan on telling them causally once the festivities begin and they offer or ask about my drinking. My only friend I have told met me with aw you’re not drinking? You’re gonna have to at my bachelorette party! (Different bachelorette party that’s coming up too :-/) she didn’t understand and really brought on some tough peer pressure. At the moment my one friend is pushing for me to stay over night so they can go out and have fun, which I get that that could just mean be out late but I feel there is an obvious cultural pressure of expected drinking and drinking debauchery. I feel so distraught honestly. Part of me is beating myself up that I can’t just do it for a night but Lord knows I’m scared to go down that road-what if I find any excuse then for it in the future? I’m six months sober and while I wasn’t in the throws of despair I saw where I was headed and how much I was having a harder and harder time stopping once I started.
I dont understand how I I can feel so good about how things are going and not think about it and feel totally normal living without it and then blast from the past moments like this party scene can have me upset and lonely, lost and feeling completely awful.
I hate this, I want to go, I want to just have fun, maybe stay over but not feel like I’m going to get the peer pressure that we should be too old for. Btw I’m not even sure anyone will pressure me, but obviously there is that fear there.
