I just lost a post so I'll try to recap
I lost hope for a lot of years. I convinced my self there was not point in getting sober because I was disabled and things would just get worse anyway.
Then I nearly died.
I looked at my life and I decided not only that I deserved better, but I deserved to give myself better.
If we all must die, then I'll die on my feet not my knees, thanks.
The funny thing is even tho I have more health problems now that I had then and even less mobility, I'm happy, I'm productive and I have hope for the future
I know that if I get hit by that bus tomorrow I've tried to make a difference to my own and to other peoples lives.
I think that's important - and I think deep down you want to say the same sweetichick...
and I really believe that you can, if you want to and you're willing to work hard.
I hope you'll stay sober and give yourself the chance
D